Oh What A Feeling...

I have now been initiated into the world of bidets. This is the bidet my sister has installed in her house.

Here's it off:

Here's it on:
Here's me squatting over it (with pants on):

Sorry, I ran out of space on my camera phone to take actual "action" shots.

I must say, the first time was quite an experience.

When facing the wall, the hot water faucet is on the left (the second picture shows the hot water on and the watter bubbling up).

So I ask my sister and brother-in-law, "So... how does this work?". They say something to the effect of "Just turn on the water and let it wash down there". Simple enough. No problem. I've been to college. I can't turn down this opportunity (-ahem- Ronin). Unfortunately, I wasn't ready to have a BM to fully test the cleansing power, so I just tried it.

I figured I'd face the wall so I can control the faucets. I drop trou and then realize I have to "remove" them to straddle this thing. OK, fine. Now I'm hovering over it (not allowing my thighs to touch the bowl). Here comes the moment of truth. I turn on the hot water faucet so that the water can warm up and... the FREAKIN' water is already HOT! I give out a "aieee!" because the "boys" down there are sensitive. I switch off the hot and turn on the cold. Another "aieee!" because the cold water bubbled up higher than the hot water. After a bit, I work out a good water temp and we're off to the races. Those leftover dingleberries didn't stand a chance. I was cleaned off in no time. I grabbed some TP, dried off and went downstairs walking like John Wayne.

My bro-in-law then asks me if I used the soap to get things extra squeaky clean. I told him the rinse was good enough for me. I mentioned to my sister that my quads were a bit tired, and she said I should actually sit on the bowl, not hover over it. She also said it's better to run the water first, test the temperature, then sit down facing forward (not to the wall). She tells me this "after" my experience.

Yesterday I told my co-worker about me using the bidet for the first time and he said they used it all the time in Yemen when he was growing up. He said he remembers coming to the US and thinking "They just wipe here? How gross."

Overall, I found it wasn't so bad. However, the next time I go to my sister's I hope I remember to have a carne asada burrito first so I can really use this thing.